Guys, be warned. Do enough Internet research about how to make a girl want you, and you are probably going to end up in some weird territory.
More than likely, if you follow this search long enough you’ll find yourself reading articles and watching videos by self-proclaimed players like former VH1 star Mystery. This guy, and guys like him, will teach you how to “neg” the self-esteem right out of Hollywood models until, in their unstable and insecure mindset, they will temporarily forget their normal standards and agree to go home with you.
If you’re willing to do absolutely anything to make a physical connection with a supermodel, Mystery may have the answer. Best of luck! However, if using manipulative, calculated measures to make women feel bad about themselves in order to convince them to sleep with you makes you feel sort of creepy, give yourself a pat on the back and continue reading.
How to Make A Girl Want You – The Right Way
Believe it or not, there are ways to make a girl want you that don’t require overhauling every aspect of your personality and trading in your conscience for eye-liner and crotch-hugging leather pants. That being said, there is one aspect of the Mystery school of thought that is undeniably true: confidence is key.
1. Be More Confident
The good news is that there are normal, healthy ways for you to exude confidence. Building real self-confidence involves spending some time working on yourself. Luckily, there are tricks to speeding up this process – and most of them come down to a little bit of good old-fashioned common sense.
For example, why not try to dress a bit nicer, speak up, make eye contact, stop doing that thing where you awkwardly tug at the bridge of your nose, or any other nervous habit. You’ll quickly notice that following these steps will create the impression of confidence, which will likely have girls paying more attention to you, which will in turn increase your self-confidence. It’s a cycle! A good cycle. A cycle that will roll you down the road of romance.
2. Do Things That You Enjoy
Girls are naturally attracted to men who are enthusiastic about life, and give off a positive aura. This is easy to accomplish if you spend time doing things that you enjoy. Are you interested in music? Cooking? Sports? Travel? Languages? Even traditionally unsexy things, such as playing the organ, can become attractive if you put your heart into it. In fact, being unique and different is very appealing.
3. Make Her Feel Special
Making a girl feel special does not require buying her expensive Cartier jewelry after the second date. Show affection from your heart, not your wallet. One of the easiest and most effective ways to make a girl feel special (and in turn, want you) is simply to listen to her. Ask questions, and then remember details that she shares with you. Don’t keep the conversation focused on you. Forget the “me, me, me.” Prove to her that you’re interested in her ideas, interests, and personality. It won’t cost you anything, and it’ll make her feel like a million bucks!
Even Cupid Texts
The next step in how to make a girl want you is to take advantage of an underutilized weapon of seduction – expert texting. Mastering the art of text messaging is an excellent way to grab a girl’s attention and have her craving yours. Anyone can text a girl, but not everyone gets noticed. We’re going to illustrate the effectiveness of creative texting through two case studies.
Case Study #1: Doug
Doug had recently met a girl and scored her phone number, but throughout the process, he didn’t have the impression that she was especially attracted to him. He quickly realized that the only way he’d have a second chance with her was through texting.
Sitting at his desk the next morning, he considered his options:
A.) The standard boring text message: “Hey Anne, it was nice meeting you. Want to meet for drinks Friday? Doug”
B.) A slightly more tricky flattery style message: “Hi Anne, it was fun chatting. It’s my sister’s birthday Friday and I’d like to buy her a new fragrance. I was wondering what perfume you were wearing last night. Doug”
Doug decided to go for option B. He started the text conversation with some soft flattery combined with a question. Soft flattery is great because it’s flirty without making you look like an obnoxious jerk. Including a question was also an excellent strategy because it substantially increased the odds of Anne actually texting him back.
After Doug positioned himself on Anne’s radar and got a conversation going, he piqued her interest even more by showing her that was a good listener:
“Hey jolie joker, there’s a fantastic act at Rick’s Friday night. I’m going with some friends. Hope to see you there. xo Doug”
Why it Worked
Doug was able to score a few positive points with this well thought out text message regarding the comedy show because:
1.) He proved that he had been a good listener by specifically remembering that she liked comedy;
2.) He underlined the fact that they shared a common interest; and
3.) He was confident enough to text her, but not too desperate in the way he brought up the idea of going to the show together.
As a result, he created the chance to see her again in a non-threatening, familiar situation. He turned this new meeting into an opportunity to make a better impression, and she now associates him with the fun night they shared together at the comedy club, rather than with the mediocre first night they met.
Case Study #2: Frank and Emma – the Golden Couple
Maybe you already have your dream girl in your life – but that doesn’t mean you’re off the hook. You still need to continue working on how to make a girl want you. The same sort of principles that apply to single-guy Doug apply to you. Enter Frank, one half of the couple known as “Fremma,” or Frank and Emma.
Frank and Emma have been together for ages. He knows what she likes for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and even post-partying hangover food. He also knows what turns her on, and what turns her off. So, does he use it?
Emma is out for an evening with her girlfriends. The program is simple – cocktails, salads, and maybe a fly by to the hot new wine bar. Frank has a golden opportunity in front of him. He can score major points by sending a sweet yet sexy message to Emma as she’s partying it up. Or, he can put himself in the dog house by showing his insecurities and being lame.
How to Make a Girl Want You – Best Strategy
Which message do you think is going to get Frank breakfast in bed the next morning?:
A.)The sexy comment: “Hey Emma, you look beautiful tonight…but then again you always look beautiful. Keeping your spot warm. xxx”
B.)The “I lack confidence” bomb: “Hey Emma, have fun but don’t please don’t talk to any other guys tonight. I don’t want to lose you.”
Option A is going to make Frank an instant hero in the eyes of Emma and her friends – that’s right, she’ll definitely share this gem with her girlfriends!
What makes Message B so much better than Message A? Frank showed confidence in his relationship by not being jealous, while making Emma feel special and beautiful.
Texting is a very powerful communication medium. By using a little thought, you can easily enjoy more romantic opportunities even when you think you’ve “blown it” in person. Well thought out text messages can help keep the flame of desire burning strong.