Before you learn how to play the player it’s important to figure out how to spot one
One thing is for sure – a player is never anxious, worried, or nervous. They always know what to say and text, and they’re always super sure of themselves.
He’ll text you with confidence and send all the right emoji’s and never second guess himself.
He’ll also shoot you lots of compliments (possibly some OTT) and love bomb you right from the start. Meaning, he’ll text you nonstop right from the beginning.
… And then he might pull away.
Where’s he gone? It’s hard to say.
Not only that, he will always be the one to decide when you’ll see him and where you will meet up. He’s controlling things, which suggests he’s got other girls on the go.
On that note, if he’s often secretively texting while he’s with you, and you’ve seen him flirting with other girls on social media, you know he’s a player.
Why is He Playing?
No one is born a player – they all become players.
Just like with any other personality type, it’s usually linked to something in his past. Maybe he had a bad childhood, his parents were never there or maybe he had a poor first relationship.
Either way, he’s now got commitment issues, he feels insecure and unloved and he seems to prefer playing games and having fun to feel validated as opposed to settling down.
So … Can You Even Play Him?
Yes!
Practically every guy can be persuaded to settle down with one woman. It’s biological! We’re all born to reproduce, with guys growing into the role of the provider.
The reason a player hasn’t committed yet is because – as we’ve just seen – something happened to him that has made him scared to get too close to someone.
This means that he isn’t a lost cause. If you can do the right things, you can not only play him – you can also get him to commit to you.
Best Tips For How To Play The Player
Maybe you just got out of a long term relationship, or you dated a shy guy. Before you do anything else, you need to put your past experiences aside. This is a different playing field with different rules.
Take Your Time to Reply to His Texts
The funny thing about players is that, while they’re not always available when you text them, they expect you to be available when they’re hot for texting.
And when you don’t reply, they get a bit sad (lol).
They might even send you follow-up texts … and they might even get a bit jealous.
See, players notice girls when they go missing. If you’re suddenly not replying, he’s going to ask what’s up.
And if he’s worried that he’s going to lose you, he’ll start making a bit more effort.
So don’t reply instantly to his texts all the time. Go missing for a few hours and even a few days. Give him the chance to miss you and chase you.
Don’t Give in too Easily to His Compliments
Let’s say he texts you to tell you how much he loves your eyes.
The easy reply here is “aww thanks so much but yours are better xx.:”
But what if you decided to play it cool when he turns on the charm? Instead of reacting so positively, what if you instead replied with something like this:
“Thanks.”
Thanks?
This sort of reply will have the player thinking things over a little bit. Because another thing about players is that you can’t always tell when their compliments are genuine.
By not reacting to his compliments, you’re showing him that you’re not as easily taken in by him as perhaps other girls are.
Don’t Be a Bore
This might sound the polar opposite of what we’ve said before – but it isn’t.
See, players hate boring people who are negative and always want to get them to commit. When they want to have some fun via texting, boring people instead ask them where the heck they’ve been all this time.
So, while you might get frustrated when they disappear from time to time, the last thing you should do is question them and send negative texts. You can disappear from time to time but that isn’t the same as being boring.
Instead, when you text them you should always try to be as upbeat as possible. Have some fun, use emojis and keep the conversation lighthearted.
Never Follow Up
Similar to being a bore, you don’t want to fall into the trap of sending him follow-up texts when he doesn’t reply for a while.
Once you do this, you’re acknowledging your interest, which is often when a player loses interest.
Why?
Part of the charm for a player is the game (if not the only charm). And when you make your feelings too obvious, the excitement begins to wane for him.
Not just that but sending follow-up texts will only bug him. As hard as it is, you must resist when he hasn’t replied to your texts. Leave him to it – and then do the same to him 😉
Assert Yourself
A player often doesn’t expect one of his “victims” to assert themselves with their own opinions and independent mind.
Rather, they expect you to always go along with their wishes, showering them with compliments and agreeing with the things they say.
Once you start texting him with thoughts of your own on various subjects, and especially once you start disagreeing with them, you’ll turn him on.
This is because, while a player might not always acknowledge it’s the case, they like women who can stand up to them. You’ll have more of a chance of playing a player and getting him to commit if you’re able to show you’re not as much of a pushover as the other women.
Final Thoughts On How To Play The Player
Playing a player is risky business and you may get your fingers burnt.
If you’ve fallen for him, you might even be heartbroken.
Therefore, while you can play a player if you follow our rules, you have to remember that this is a game to him, whereas for you it might be more serious.
Take our advice onboard and keep cool with the texts, don’t respond to his flattery and make sure to assert yourself. It can be fun, it can be challenging and it could be rewarding.
Proceed with caution.
