In 2017, more and more of us are in long-distance relationships. Which means more and more guys are sitting around thinking “I miss my girlfriend!”. However distance is a beautiful thing! [Tweet “Just think how wonderful it is that a girl in Bolivia could be dating a guy in France!”] A hundred years ago, such a thing would have been pure fantasy.
Now, it’s become commonplace – so commonplace that the only people who bat an eyelid when we tell them we’re in a long distance relationship are our moms who still think we should marry the guy or girl who lives next door.
However, as beautiful as long-distance relationship is, there is the potential for more heartbreak and sadness. There is no denying the fact that there is a distance between the two of you. And while you can get past this a lot of the time and stay connected via text, Skype, and the occasional holiday, there will be times when the sadness engulfs you and you can’t help but say: “I miss her – I miss my girlfriend and wish she was here with me.”
Admitting this to yourself is the best thing you can do. It’s when we deny there are any problems at all with a long-distance relationship that the real problems can start to mount up. When you suppress your sadness, you let that sadness build and build until it turns into some serious pain.
It’s nice that you admit you miss your girlfriend. But don’t just tell me (I will help you to overcome the pain very soon) – tell her, too. She’ll appreciate it. She wants to hear it from you. She doesn’t want you to miss her to the point where you feel pain, but of course she wants to know that you love her so much you want her by your side.
Once you’ve admitted that you miss her, let me tell you that the next step is to realize that this isn’t the end of the world. It’s comforting to know that she’s only a phone call or a video chat away at pretty much anytime. Thanks to the wonders of technology, you can stay instantly connected at all times. I know this isn’t the same as being together physically, but it’s much, much better than nothing.
And hey, it means that you still get to hear the sweet melody of her voice in your ear as you lie in bed!
If you’re really missing your better half right now, let me help you out. Let’s take a look at ways you can ease the pain.
When you are feeling lonely, it’s really important that you stay as busy as possible. The moment you have nothing to do is the moment you start to feel really down.
I know it’s nice to spend time thinking about her, but it’s not cool when you start to feel depressed, anxious and really upset.
She wants you to stay strong right now. She wants you to stay active, busy and productive.
I look at it like this: When I was 19 and missing my boyfriend, I could have either curled up in a ball and felt sorry for myself all day long, or I could use him as my muse, my inspiration and motivation to stay productive.
All the work I did during that time was for him. He pushed me on. I worked solid hours as a waitress to put money together to go and see him. I worked hard on my school work because I wanted him to date someone who was smart, proactive and achieved things.
I missed him, but missing him really drove me on to get to a point in life where we could be together someday. I knew that to get to that stage I would have to put in the hard work. And I did.
And you can, too.
The moment you stop working and doing stuff is the moment the pain gets a lot worse.
Write a Poem to Her
I got some excellent advice from a friend of mine who had been in the same situation before: When you can’t talk to her at a particular time when you REALLY want to talk to her, write to her instead. In this way, you’re still talking to her.
When she’s unavailable to chat, write a poem or love letter to her that you can send at a later date. This will make her feel close to you, and as a bonus you’re also flexing your creative muscles. You’re killing two birds with one stone.
Writing a poem helps you to purge some of the negative energy that’s inside you as you’re going through this tough time. It gives you the chance to put on paper what’s in your head and heart.
Try it and see how good it feels. You’ll feel her love. It will feel awesome.
Then, the next day you could mail it to her.
Love, Love, Love!
When you REALLY ache for your girlfriend and she’s not around, you feel like shouting from the rooftops: “I miss my girlfriend and wish she was here!”
Sadly, she isn’t. But you’ve still got tremendous feelings of love inside you. You want to kiss her, hug her and even have sex with her. But you cant…
So what do you do?
Just remember that all this energy is POSITIVE energy. It’s awesome that you feel this way about your girl! Not all guys do – but you definitely do!
Picture her with you. Imagine yourself touching her, kissing her, caressing her. Don’t let this energy and this moment go to waste, but use it to your advantage. Then next time you see her you’ll savor her kisses even more!
I Miss My Girlfriend Enough To Make Plans
Okay, so you could spend the whole time moping around and feeling miserable because she’s not there. You could spend the whole day in bed, unable to move because you feel so unmotivated.
You could even cancel plans with buddies, take time off work and hide away indoors because you feel so sorry for yourself.
You could do all that. Or, you could get a bit excited by making some plans for when you guys do actually meet up next!
Making plans is a great way to spend your time when you’re feeling sad. It gives you something to do, lifts your mood and helps to banish those blues you’ve been feeling.
Plus, when you make plans, you remind yourself that, while it totally sucks at the moment now that you’re not with her, you will be with her again eventually.
Write down some things the two of you could do together when you meet up. Maybe you could go to a concert, take a road trip somewhere, or explore a new city.
You could literally spend the whole day planning (while listening to the music you both love). Awesome, right?
“I Miss My Girlfriend Too Much!”… So Find a Way of Meeting Her Sooner!
If you’re starting to get really bluesy because you haven’t seen her for so long, you might have to commence Plan B: Find a way of meeting her sooner.
While people say that waiting builds character and that absence makes the heart grow fonder, sometimes the wait is truly unbearable.
At the moment, you might think there is no way you can meet her sooner. But trust me, there is always a way. The universe has a great way of smiling on those who ask it for help. If you miss her and need to see her sooner, think of ways you can both make this happen.
When I wanted to meet my boyfriend sooner, the obstacle in my way was a lack of money. I needed X amount to get across to the other side of my country, and my lousy job as a waitress meant that it was going to take me three months to save all that money up.
“Screw that!” I eventually thought. “Three months is way too much time!”
So, I found a better job working in the lab for one of my professors and was able to save up money much faster than I had ever hoped. If you miss her enough and really, REALLY want to see her sooner, there are ways to do it.
Stop saying “I miss my girlfriend” and start doing something about it. Get moving, and you’ll be together again in no time!