Want to learn how to get over a guy so that you can move on with your life and start afresh?
We’ve all been dealt a cruel hand by love and fate, two forces which somehow conspired to make us fall madly in love with a man who either didn’t love us back, or who lost all affection for us over time.
It’s hard, it’s horrible and it often feels as though we’ll never get over him.
Fortunately, the old adage that time is the best healer is 100% true.
However, time takes time, and right now you’ll want to get over him as soon as possible so that you feel like your old self again. Let’s take a look at how to get over a guy and move on.
Be Happy for Him
When a guy breaks up with us, boy, do we feel all the emotions. We feel angry, upset, bitter, jealous, resentful, torn, anguished, lovelorn and then some.
But rarely do we feel happy for him.
And why would we?!
The thing is that, if you really loved him – and still do – it’s your duty to be happy for him and to want what’s best for him.
See this situation from his point of view. He liked you, possibly he even loved you. Perhaps he still does. But he could see that you two weren’t meant to be. He still needs someone; he needs someone to look after him, care for him and love him.
Why wouldn’t you want what’s best for him?
Be happy for the man you loved, shower his memory with positive emotions and wish him all the best. It will help you heal a lot sooner than staining his memory with negative emotions and wishing he never finds love ever again.
Remember the Bad Stuff
Remembering the so-called bad stuff isn’t the same as staining his memory with negative emotions. Instead, this will ensure that you get a grip on reality and stop idealizing him.
Sure, he was great and you loved him. The two of you shared some awesome laughs and memories together. But don’t forget that there was a reason this ended. Maybe there were a few reasons.
He isn’t perfect – no one is. Recall the times when he annoyed you. Recall his bad habits. Recall the times when he started to make YOU question whether this relationship was worth your time or not.
He was flawed just like everyone else, and it’s important that you remember this.
Rediscover Your Purpose
As great as he was, and as much as you liked/loved him, remember that he wasn’t your ultimate purpose in life.
You had a life before he came along and you’ve got a life now that he’s gone.
Rediscover your purpose/mission in life and focus on it. What is it that you ultimately want for yourself?
Working on your purpose will strengthen your sense of self and make you realize that you don’t need someone else to validate your existence. This is your life and your chance to win.
Focus On Self-Improvement
One of the best ways to heal after a breakup is to show him that he was missing, and what the rest of the world – or, at least, another man – can get.
To do this, you need to focus on self-improvement. This could mean going to the gym and getting into the best shape of your life. It could mean reading books and learning a new skill.
It could mean taking a course or working on your self-confidence.
Whatever you do, don’t feel sorry for yourself. Instead, work on yourself and be the best version of you.
Remember That There Will Be Other Opportunities
Being single has its pros and cons. One of the things we miss after a breakup is being close and intimate with someone. We miss lying in their bed and holding them.
But it’s important to remember that you’re still awesome and that there will be other opportunities.
He was an amazing guy who loved you. Why? Because you’re amazing, too!
[Tweet “There will be other guys and adventures out there who are waiting.”] Just make sure you are ready for them when the time comes.
Don’t Contact Him
Lastly, it’s very important that you go No Contact.
I know it’s tempting to text him, even if it’s just on the pretext that you’ve still got something of his that needs returning. But once you re-establish contact, all the old feelings and emotions that you’ve been trying to lose will come rushing back, at which point you’ll be back at square one.
Resist texting him. Eventually, whole days will pass when the thought of texting him doesn’t even cross your mind because you’ll realize that you can live without him.
These are a few ways how to get over a guy. Got any questions? Feel free to leave a comment in the box below!
I met this guy on dating site and we started seeing each other but I actually became his booty call.. he was all over me at the beginning then less and less untill I realised he is actually a player.. I cannot get over him and i do send him a message which he sometimes read or doesn’t even make an effort to read at all! Few times i told him off and then he would apologise saying that he was soo busy… i am in unhappy marriage and he is single, divorced.
What can i say except that i really enjoyed his attention that i miss but at the same time I feel stupid and used..
Thanks for your tima
I’m so sorry to hear about what happened, it sounds like it was the wrong guy at the wrong time. I can imagine that you enjoyed his attention and the excitement of a new relationship. However, as you are still in a relationship you need to make a decision. Do you want to work things out with your husband, or do you want to move on? How does he feel? Does he want to make it work? As soon as you have your current situation figured out you will forget about this guy and move on to something healthy and happy.
Wishing you the best of luck, and sending tons of positive energy your way.