It can start off innocently enough: You always go to the same restaurants, have the same bedroom routine, vent about work, leave the toilet seat up, and send the same boring text messages. Some people try and just suck it up, but other fearless romantics struggle to accept it.
So, how can you add some zest back into your relationship? If you’re a regular reader of my blog than you probably already know what I’m going to say: How about a few strategic flirty text messages?
Make That Somethin’ Somethin’ Happen
What is the secret sauce that is often missing in keeping the long-term relationship spark? Being a little unpredictable, sexy (like day one), and your good old thoughtful self – all at the same time. Guess what? You can be all those thing through texting!
But wait, before you start copying and pasting messages you find somewhere on the Internet (or you sign up for our 30 day free texting club trial ☺), you need to understand what kind of texts your partner is craving. While I can’t answer that question for you, I do have a few general guidelines that should steer you in the right direction.
HaHaHa All The Way Home
Everyone loves to smile, AND the person that makes you smile! If your relationship has managed to pass the test of time, then there’s a pretty good chance that your partner finds something about your funny (or you’re incredibly attractive, rich or they are just too lazy to leave you – but that’s another post). So, don’t “tuck your humor away”.
Take the extra 3 minutes to text something creative and funny. Just make sure that you stay true to YOUR style of humor. For example, is this you?
“Honey! I thought I told you not to talk to strangers at the door.”
(honestly, that wouldn’t work for me, but I have a goofy friend who could totally pull it off )
Or, is this you:
“Thinking about growing an orange mustache: sexy or not?”
Be That Romantic Lover Your Partner Craves
The art of romance seems to be slipping away from society, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t embrace it. Don’t rely on Leonardo DiCaprio to do all the hard romancing on-screen. Bring romance back into your everyday routine, because it’s good stuff!
Have you ever thought about romance and why it’s so important? If you haven’t, you should because you need to “buy in” before you do anything else. You can smell a phony romantic from a mile away.
To me, romance is the perfect combination of love and lust that makes a person (like almost every person) feel wanted and wonderful.
So, when texting your partner something romantic, your message should come across as genuine, thoughtful, and alluring. For example:
“By the way tonight is officially date night. I expect you to be looking stunning when I get home.”
“Pick up a bottle of champagne; I’ve got dessert ready.”
Can you imagine having a long day at work and then checking your phone only to see this little gem pop up? Forget 50 Shades of Grey and start making your life your own personal romance novel.
Bring Your Sexy Back For A Long-Term Relationship Spark
Many long-term couples struggle to have a fulfilling sex life, and a lot of people just end up forgetting about sex. Don’t do it! Sex is one of the good things, and obviously super important for maintaining the long-term relationship spark. So, fire it up between the sheets by playing with their imagination and texting something that will captivate their mind and body:
“Already naked. Come. Home. Now.”
“Ready to be completely and totally dominated…?”
It’s great to feel adored all the time, but it’s even nicer when you receive some unexpected affection. When it comes to telling your partner how much you appreciate them, don’t wait until they are standing in front of you – make them feel loved from afar via text.
So, instead of sending ‘I love you sweetie’ every day at 10:30 am, text him or her something specific, at a random hour. For example:
“Just thinking about your soft skin and your incredible smell…I’m one lucky guy.”
“I can’t go twenty minutes without thinking about you.”
“Looking around I’m constantly reminded that nobody comes close to you.”
Remember: texting is just another mode of communication.
What’s The Final Key To A Long-Term Relationship Spark?
Keep it fun. Yes, I’m the queen of fun. And I know from experience that it’s fricking hard to keep a long-term relationship fun, because there are so many not fun things to do – take out the garbage, pay the bills, mow the lawn and make sacrifices for the good of the couple (sports bars, shopping trips and in-laws). So, whenever you can, try to add a little fun and play some flirty texting games, or send them a random photo that you think they might like. Also, make sure that you keep communication open and honest. Make sure your relationship is built on trust and you don’t lose track of what made you fall in love with your partner in the first place.
Keeping the long-term relationship spark alive is a long-term project, that can, and should, start as soon as possible. So, whip out your cell phone and start flirting.
Romance is not dead!