Today I have a special treat. My dear friend Caroline Brealey, the award winning matchmaker (and all around amazing person) has stopped by the blog again with some of her expert experience on texting and dating. So get ready to hear it straight from Cupid's own keyboard!

Caroline is going to explain why you should never read too much into a text.

We’ve all been there, agonizing over what a text message really means. As a match maker I’m often asked to decipher my clients’ text messages but I have learned that if you read too much into a text it can lead to trouble. Here’s why you shouldn’t spend hours agonizing over that text message…

1. They May Be Distracted

Living in such an instant world means that sometimes it’s easy to forget to make a little bit of an effort. If you’re rushing off to a meeting, grappling with signal problems, you’re working out, had a stressful day or you’re just not that present, then sometimes you’re not thinking about what you’re writing.

Whilst some of us agonize tirelessly to compose the perfect text with humor, casualness and intrigue – others have a very short window to reply and don’t give it a second thought. So if you’ve received a short text, maybe even a little abrupt, please don’t worry as some people want to quickly reply rather than spend a lot of time over a single message.

2. Some People Just Aren’t Good At It

We’re not all writers, literary geniuses or natural colloquial! So don’t put too much pressure on wanting every text to be funny or interesting; as long as you get on in person then you’re on the right track. However, if you see a sudden change in their communication habits, have a conversation with them. For example, if he was super charming when you first met and after second date he stopped texting you like a love interest, and more like a colleague, ask him why.

3. You’re Not Dating Your Phone

You’ve got to remember that it’s about what you’re like in person.We’ve found some people to be amazing texters but a relationship doesn’t come down to that; it’s all about being comfortable together.

Later down the line if texts are bothering you then bring it up. Remember: Communication is important for a healthy relationship.

4. We Know People Read Too Much Into A Text

We’re all a little anxious and nervous when messaging someone we’re dating. Some thoughts that cross our minds are “Am I using the right tone?” or “Is this grabbing their attention?” etc. Consequently it can then make us say the strangest things because we’re trying too hard. So give everyone a little leniency.

5. You Don’t Know Your Relationship Status so You’re Both Unsure On What’s Too Personal and What Isn’t

Someone might be more into the other during the early stages of dating. So try and navigate around this. Also, people may write a bit more affectionately after a few drinks but in the day their texts appear shorter and to the point. Or the other way around, you never know until you really get to know the person.


Claudia Cox

Claudia Cox is a modern communication expert who gives singles and couples alike the tools they need to improve their relationships. She is the creator of The Text Weapon Texting Club, and the author of French Seduction Made Easy. She loves the outdoors, baking tasty treats for friends, and of course, texting.
Learn more about French Seduction Made Easy.

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