I have a very special treat for you today: Jonathan Bird, the Managing Director of Warehousedating.com stopped by with some spot on tips for what to text after a new date. So, Before you hit "send", take a minute to read Jonathan's 6 fabulous texts, and tips.

Enter Jonathan

Text message flirting and texting a new date is always hard. There are so many things that could be said but where to start? Can’t send one too long or too short, too flirty, too blunt, too descriptive, too pushy, too needy… so many rules it’s surprising people actually date!

1. The humour route – “How did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank his coffee before it was cool…!”

Stay away from the cheesy jokes like “Is your name Summer? Coz you’re hot!” It looks like you’re trying too hard to be “cute” and make a laugh. Aim to put on smile on their face without making them cringe. This works best when it comes naturally such as making fun of someone you date says or does. Everyone loves a person who can make them laugh and cheer them up. Humour is a big thing in relationships, it’s attractive and, honestly, who doesn’t love to laugh? Even if your jokes are horrible, people appreciate you trying.

2. Compliment – “Hey, you have an amazing personality”

Text message flirting is like real flirting. Everyone loves to be told that someone thinks they are great or have great interests. It’s confidence building and shows there’s interest from the person messaging. Sending messages when online dating can always be scary so putting compliments in the conversation will make both of you feel more relaxed. It’s not the best idea to compliment looks with a new date yet because it makes you look like you’re only interested in looks.

3. Ask questions – “Did you have a good day? What did you get up to?”

Questions show an interest in the person’s life. Makes you look like you care about getting to know your new date. Questions are especially useful when online dating because you’ve, most probably, never met the match before so it makes it easier to find out information about them if you ask a lot of questions, but also shows you have an interest in getting to know them and not just looking to hook up.

4. Prove you’ve listened or read their online dating profile – “There’s a _____ concert next month! Do you want to come with me?”

This shows you actually have taken in information about your date. Your new date won’t become anything more if you don’t take note of what has been said/written. Also taking interest in their interests shows you care about them and want to relate to them as much as you can. No one wants to become close with someone who doesn’t listen or want to learn about their interests.

5. Address your new date personally – “How you doing today Sam?”

Using their name makes the message more personal and people seem to like their name being used because it connects them to the conversation. Also if using an online dating site, it just shows you know which person you’re talking to and you’re making an effort.

6. Just put effort in using capitals, punctuation, spelling correctly and try not to write a very short message – “Hello, just read your profile and out interests are very similar! I also love animals, you can tell this by the two dogs and three rabbits I own. I would like to get to know you better and possibly even take you out sometime? Have a good day.”

Just by using proper grammar and punctuation should show you actually care about sending the message and want to see if it will go anywhere. Never use “text talk” when online dating until you properly know the person you’re talking to and you don’t have to be so formal to impress them.

The Text Message Flirting Tip Of All Tips

Finally, the surprising trick you should never do… Although this may sound very obvious, the one thing you should never do on a first date is flash! It may sound like a fun thing to do which would possibly lead to a bit more fun, but you’ll end up ruining your chance of anything more with your date and embarrassing yourself. No one wants to see your bits hanging loose before they even know you. Try to stay classy and respectable, at least for a few dates.

Et voila! 6 tips for super charged text message flirting.


Claudia Cox

Claudia Cox is a modern communication expert who gives singles and couples alike the tools they need to improve their relationships. She is the creator of The Text Weapon Texting Club, and the author of French Seduction Made Easy. She loves the outdoors, baking tasty treats for friends, and of course, texting.
Learn more about French Seduction Made Easy.

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  1. What does it really mean when a guy texts you pictures of his recent ex girlfriend and suggestive poses of other ex-girlfriends. Also I’m tempted to send him a picture of a recent guy I dated he’s very handsome in order to make him know what it feels like to get pictures of exes that are unsolicited that’s kind of stupid lobe do you think it would teach him why its not a good idea, as heretofore I’ve tried reasoning with him and he does not understand that most women don’t want to see pictures of other women and you think Leslie that this is true? thanks much

    1. Hi Katie,
      It sounds like he is immature, trying to make you jealous or just plain old inexperienced with women. If you have already tried talking to him and he doesn’t listen, then go for it – send him some photos of good looking ex boyfriends. Wait and see his reaction, then talk to him again. If he’s immature or a player he will probably not listen to what you have to say. If he’s just inexperienced, then maybe he will have learned his lesson…
      Good luck!

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