Guys, if you’ve got her number, you don’t wanna mess this up. We’re gonna look at how to text a girl in this article so that she stays interested and wants to take things further with you. In the world we are living in, your phone is your weapon. You can use it to meet girls, chat to them and really get to know them. You can find dates, soul mates and new friends. But woah, easy there, Romeo. Soul mates? You’re not quite there yet. First of all, you’ve gotta get over the trickiest hurdle of all at this point –

Figuring out how to text girls.

Some guys make this look easy, and to a certain extent it is – but only if you know what you’re doing.

Once you’ve got the swing of it, the world becomes your oyster. All of a sudden, the girl you’ve been trying to finesse replies instantaneously. She actually seems interested in you. Even better, she’s started texting you first and wants to know about your day!

Gone are the days when she took a week just to say “OK.”

1. Number One Rule In How To Text Girls: Make Her Smile

Marketers know that if you can make the customer feel good about your brand and product, you’ve got a great chance of making a sale.

It’s all about promoting the feel-good factor, which means making people feel good not just about you and your company, but also about themselves.

We can apply this to almost everything related in how to text girls.

No one wants to be texting a sad person who clearly feels bad about themselves, and who makes us feel bad, too. If you’ve got issues and are wallowing in a sea of self-pity, don’t text her. There’s no point. Unless you have been together for ages, in which case, give her a call or suggest meeting up in person.

It’s simple enough, but all you need to do is make her smile. Add plenty of positivity to your texts! Keep your chin up. Be enthusiastic and optimistic. Be cheerful! Talk about positive things and avoid anything which can cause conflict, such as politics.

2. Join In The Fun

You know what girls hate? Guys who are always serious.

A lot of girls love to play, especially when it comes to texting. They love to have some fun, poking fun at themselves and YOU, you silly goose.

And they find it adorable and cute when you join in. Doing this lightens the mood and makes it easier for her to text you. She knows she doesn’t have to walk on eggshells because you’ve made it comfortable for her to text you. You’re easygoing, relaxed and fun to banter with.


Her: “Your hair cut is so funny LOL.”



As opposed to:

Her: “Your hair cut is so funny LOL.”

You: “Everyone else likes it. Maybe it’s just you.”

Ouch …

3. Don’t Ask Lame Questions

There are good questions and there are lame questions.

You know the kind:

“What’s your favorite color?”

“If you could be a historical figure, who would you be?”

And, of course:

“Why don’t you wanna date me?”

Getting to know a girl should be an exciting, discovery process. You don’t want to learn everything about her before your first date. Save some mystery.

So, unless you aren’t able to meet in real life, keep your deep questions to a minimum.

Now, isn’t that refreshing?

Of course, “how was your day?” and “what are your plans for the weekend?” are classics that do no harm. But they can also invite a big sigh from her when she knows all she can say in response is “not much wbu?”


4. Build The Conversation Naturally

A cooler approach would be to make your texts so interesting and entertaining that you don’t need to ask a string of questions, your conversation builds naturally.

You: “where are you ticklish?”

Her: “I’m not telling you that, maybe you will use it against me :)”

You: “OK, you leave me no choice but to find out myself. What are you up to this weekend? Want to have a picnic in the park? I promise no tickling (but maybe some kissing :)”

If you need to throw out a few questions to get the conversation flowing that’s fine. But try not to swamp her with questions.

5. How To Text Girls: Try Role Play

I’ve got a pretty big imagination,  so indulging in role play via text is easy for me. It might not come so naturally to you at first, but I really recommend that you get to grips with it because role playing could be your secret weapon as you look to charm her and get her interested in you.

Role play is just FUN.

Use your imagination and go wild. Create stories that involve the two of you. If you are just getting to know each other, don’t get too hot too soon…there will be time for that later.

Go ahead and tease her as you indulge in role playing. You could even get a bit naughtier. For example, maybe when she texts, you could pretend that she’s a sexy stranger that you’re dying to meet..

6. Avoid Passive Aggressive Texts

If you’ve got something to say to her, say it. Don’t beat around the bush with sly texts that suggest you’ve got an issue with her while trying to mask it with a bit of humor and a “LOL”.

And, okay, so she’s slow at replying. So what? Play it cool. Don’t badger her to reply. Don’t ask her, “Why do you always take so long to reply?”, or don’t say “FINALLY!” when she does eventually reply.

This sort of thing only causes her to associate texting you with negativity, and she’ll probably take even longer to reply in the future if all she’s going to get from you is a whole load of grief when she does text.

There are certain things you might want to say to her, but these could easily push her away.

Texting is meant to be fun. As soon as you start whining about her response time, it loses all that sense of fun for her. The atmosphere becomes frosty, and she might decide that this isn’t worth it anymore.

7. Don’t Flood Her Inbox

Obviously, you have to put in effort, otherwise you’ll never get what you want. Go for quality over quantity.

Too much effort from you makes you look like a try-hard who’s put all your eggs in one basket.

In other words, you’re suffocating her.

This isn’t cool.

Instead of being the one who is asking all the questions, texting first, sending lengthy messages and replying instantly, adopt a different role right from the start. Show genuine interest in her, but don’t act as though it’s a job interview. Take it easy. Don’t send 2 or 3 texts in one go. Match hers, but make sure yours count.

I hope you enjoyed my tips on how to text girls. Good luck, and please leave a comment if I can help!

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Claudia Cox

Claudia Cox is a modern communication expert who gives singles and couples alike the tools they need to improve their relationships. She is the creator of The Text Weapon Texting Club, and the author of French Seduction Made Easy. She loves the outdoors, baking tasty treats for friends, and of course, texting.
Learn more about French Seduction Made Easy.

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  1. Thanks for an insightful article. I agree with most things you say, but I would say that building pictures in her mind is another aspect that you should do in your texts.

    Make her imagine how good a date, or even a day in your life would be so that she can think about it when you’re not around her.

    Describe something you do, or something you would like to do together with her for the best effect.

    1. Hi Rickard,
      It’s nice to hear from you! 🙂 I totally agree with you – painting a picture with your words is a very powerful texting technique to build anticipation, keep things spicy and the prevent the conversation from getting stale.

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